How do I leave an abusive relationship?

There is no easy answer or blanket answer to this question. You need to carefully evaluate your situation and come up with a safety plan that will work for you.

Whatever plan you decide on should help you to respond to a crisis and protect both you and your children. You should consider a safety plan that:

  • Keeps you safe while still living in the home with your abuser
  • Prepares you for leaving the home
  • Shields you from your abuser after you leave.

No safety plan will be a full guarantee of your safety. However, by having one in place, you can certainly reduce the risk of harm.

Please see our page on Safety Plans for an extensive list of considerations. You can also reach out to a local domestic violence agency. The N.C. Coalition Against Domestic Violence is a good place to start.


Charles Ullman & Associates provides you respected, experienced and knowledgeable divorce and family law attorneys. You can trust us to help you through the legal process efficiently and effectively so you can transition to the next phase of your life. Our community involvement reaches beyond charitable support of important causes. We launched our own movement in Fraternities4Family and provide scholarships to able students in need.