Divorce is difficult, not just for you and your spouse, but for your child as well. Even though we know dads and moms both want to do what is in their child’s best interests, we also realize parents may not always agree on how to go about accomplishing that goal.
When dads and moms are ordered to pay child support as part of a divorce settlement, they may wonder if the strain on their bank account is worth it.
Is the child support money you pay being properly used? Is your child actually benefiting from your support? Do child support payments matter? How can you know for sure?
What Your Child Wants to Say
The fact is that child support does matter to your child. While your child may not actually see any of the money directly, the funds you send will be allocated to help pay for the various expenses of raising a child.
When you know what he or she wants to say, it may help you gain a more comprehensive understanding of what child support means to your child – and it may take some of the sting out of making payments.
Perhaps this imaginary letter from your child will help ease your mind:
Dear Dad (or Mom),
I just wanted to thank you for sending child support. Sometimes I feel sad that you are not able to be around every day, but knowing you are helping pay for the things I need makes me happy.
I’m so grateful to you for helping me do things like:
- Get new clothes and shoes when I grow out of mine.
- Keep a roof over my head, lights on so I can see to do my homework, as well as water to drink, brush my teeth and take baths.
- Keep the TV on, as you know how much I love watching my favorite shows.
- Stay online, so I can email you all the time, do school research and message my friends.
- Get a good education, which as you know can be expensive when we have to cover costs of school supplies, lunch money, school uniforms and field trips (but it’s all worth it!).
- Cover health care costs, like medical and dental insurance and co-pays, so I can stay healthy.
- Get the child care I need after school.
- Buy an outfit for the school dance.
- Be able to do the activities I love, like going skating, to the movies, bowling, camping and taking trips to the beach.
- Afford extracurricular activities like summer camp, music lessons and after-school sports.
I do realize all you do to help and I want to make sure you know what it means to me.
Your daughter (or son)
Getting Help with Child Support
If you need assistance getting your spouse to make timely child support payments, or you need help adjusting the terms of your child support agreement because your financial situation has changed, contact a North Carolina child support attorney. With the help of a skilled attorney, you can fight to make sure your child has adequate financial support.